Ended
Snore Certificate Printer
A bedside meter that prints a certificate of the night's loudest snore.
€14,520
pledged of €33,000 goal
- Backers
- 150
- Funded
- 44%
- From
- €79
Backed by Halvard E., Petra N. and 148 others
Pledging has closed
Story
Two people can share a bed for years and never agree on who is louder. The Snore Certificate Printer settles it in writing.
The dispute
The Inventor built the first unit after a disagreement that had gone on long enough that neither party trusted the other's account of the night. A calibrated microphone above the bed was the only witness either side was willing to accept. It has not been asked to take sides since; it only measures.
The measurement
The microphone logs sound pressure continuously from the moment the light goes off, resolving to 0.1 dB. At wake time, the device finds the single loudest moment of the night, the time it happened, and how long it lasted before dropping back under the noise floor. Nothing is discarded until the certificate is printed.
The certificate
The result prints on a 58 mm thermal strip: peak level, time of peak, duration, and a signature line in a fixed typeface unique to the device. It looks like a receipt because it is treated like one. A single roll lasts 120 nights. On request, the device will print a second copy of the same night's certificate, so both parties in the room can hold one.
Two printers, one log
The Dispute pair links two units to the same overnight log, so each side prints from their own bedside device rather than passing one certificate back and forth. Both copies report the same number. Neither unit rounds in anyone's favour.
Shipping
The printer and one roll ship worldwide. A spare roll only has a use once a printer is already in the house, so it ships alongside a Standard printer or Dispute pair pledge, never on its own to a new backer.
| Microphone | Calibrated condenser, continuous logging through the night |
|---|---|
| Resolution | 0.1 dB |
| Power | Mains, AC adapter included |
| Certificate | 58 mm thermal paper, one per morning |
| Roll capacity | 120 nights per roll |
| Certificate contents | Peak decibel level, time of peak, duration of the event |
| Authentication | Signed by device, fixed typeface |
| Second copy | Duplicate certificate for the other party, on request |
Rewards
Standard printer
€79
One Snore Certificate Printer, the microphone unit, and one roll of 58 mm thermal paper good for 120 nights.
- Ships to Domestic, Europe, Rest of world
- Est. delivery Dec 2026
- 120 claimed
Dispute pair
€139
Two Snore Certificate Printers on one shared certificate log, so both parties in the same room can print their own copy of the same night.
- Ships to Domestic, Europe, Rest of world
- Est. delivery Dec 2026
- 30 claimed
Add-ons
- Thermal paper roll, 58 mmOne spare roll, good for 120 nights of certificates.360 of 400 left€12
Just support it
Pledging has closed. Bonus support is no longer accepted.
Updates
What happened next
The prototype remains on the bench and prints one certificate each night, for the Inventor. No unit has left the bench.
The Campaign has ended
The Snore Certificate Printer closed at 44% of its goal, so production will not go ahead and no unit has left the bench.
Thank you to the 150 backers who wanted a receipt instead of an argument. Nobody has been charged.
A note on the second copy
The second-copy feature prints a duplicate of the same recorded night, not a fresh reading. Both copies will always agree, since they come from the same log.
On the loudest-event rule
Several backers have asked why the certificate reports only the single loudest moment of the night rather than a full log. The full log is recorded and kept on the device; the certificate exists to settle one question, so it prints one number.
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Comments
Does it distinguish snoring from other bedroom sounds, or does everything get logged as a candidate?
Everything above the noise floor is logged. Only the single loudest event of the night makes the certificate.
Backed the pair. We have been arguing about this for three years and a receipt seemed like the fastest way to end it.
What happens if the loudest sound of the night is not snoring at all, say a door or a dropped phone?
The certificate reports the loudest sound pressure event of the night. It does not identify its source.
Is 0.1 dB resolution overkill for this?
The first dispute was settled by less than a decibel. It is not overkill.
Added a spare roll to my pledge. 120 nights felt short for how often this comes up in our house.
Can one printer serve two beds in the same room, or does each bed need its own unit?
One microphone per printer. It cannot attribute a sound to a particular bed.
Hoping this reaches its goal. Checking the tracker every morning at this point.
Sorry to see it end short. We could have used one of these for the guest room.
Thank you to all 150 backers. Nobody has been charged, and the printers are staying right where they are, on the bench.